Chris Christie

Morning Docket

Morning Docket: 05.31.23

* When the Supreme Court tried to deflect the heat from Clarence Thomas taking hundreds of thousands of dollars in gifts, the justices signed an ethics pinky swear. Alito breached it within the month. [Slate] * Corporate legal departments are hiring smaller law firms to save money. I swear we wrote this exact same story... the last time there was a whiff of rate hikes only to have everything return to normal in a year. [Corporate Counsel] * Sam Bankman-Fried preparing to blame Fenwick & West for everything. [Fortune] * Texas lawmakers unveil new anti-ESG laws to limit insurance carriers from considering environmental issues. You know... the environmental issues they're being asked to pay for. I'd like to limit life insurers from considering my career as a crocodile wrestler too, but c'est la vie. [Bloomberg Law News] * The family at the center of the opioid crisis can successfully shield themselves from liability because that's what corporations do! [Courthouse News Service] * NLRB goes after non-compete agreements and it's honestly a little shocking that they haven't always been going after non-compete agreements. [Law360] * Chris Christie announcing a presidential run next week. Over/under on the number of times he mentions that he was a prosecutor in his kickoff speech? I'm setting the line at 9. [CNN]

By Above the Law
Morning Docket

Morning Docket: 06.12.18

* Proskauer tells the EEOC that there's nothing "sinister" about employers demanding that sexual harassment victims sign away their legal rights to be railroaded through employer-chosen kangaroo courts and then forcibly silenced. Welcome to 2018. [National Law Journal] * In emoluments news, Judge Peter Messitte asked the Justice Department if, based on their chosen defense, "Wouldn't that be bribery?" which he seemed to think would be a bad thing as if the Supreme Court hadn't legalized bribery in McDonnell. [US News] * Chris Christie is starting his own law firm and somehow Rudy Giuliani has already managed to lie about that. [NJ.com] * Betsy DeVos succeeded in keeping fraud victims indebted to the government. She was also ordered to stop pursuing collection actions against the victims, but she still gets to destroy their credit ratings, which is still a great day for kleptocracy. [Courthouse News Service] * Nelson Mullins merging with Broad and Cassel as part of the growing trend of super-regional firms designed to keep the Am Law elite at bay. [Daily Report] * In a lesson on putting carts ahead of horses, the former general counsel for Portland, Oregon's public school district was just admitted to the bar... after the state bar lodged ethics violations against him for serving in that role without a law license in the state. [Portland Tribune]

By Joe Patrice
Morning Docket

Morning Docket: 04.02.18

* Former New Jersey Governor Chris Christie is a little worried about President Trump's flair for hyperbole, saying that Trump should never "walk into that room with" special counsel Robert Mueller, because when you make "false statements to federal agents, that's a crime, that can send you to jail." [The Hill] * This is not an April Fools' joke. On April 1, Foley & Lardner finalized its Tex-Mex merger with Gardere Wynne Sewell. We repeat, this is not an April Fools' joke. Foley will maintain its headquarters in Milwaukee Wisconsin. Best of luck to the combined firm! [Texas Lawyer] * Long Island Judge Robert Cicale was arrested after allegedly breaking into a former intern's house to steal a pair of her panties. At his arraignment, he admitted that he'd done it before, and in his confession, he said "he has urges to steal women's underwear." We'll have more on the alleged panty thief later. [NBC New York] * According to a new report by Fairfax Associates, law firm mergers are set to meet (or perhaps beat) 2017's record. Twenty tie-ups have been completed in 2018 thus far, with another 13 announced mergers set to close later this year. [American Lawyer] * New York firm Morrison Cohen recently launched the "MoCo cryptocurrency litigation tracker," a tool investors can use to monitor when doing due diligence on crypto assets. There are currently 63 cases in the U.S., and some of the industry's biggest players have been named as defendants. [Brave New Coin]

By Staci Zaretsky
Non-Sequiturs

Non-Sequiturs: 07.13.17

* The TRUE story behind what it's like to be a lawyer in Trumpland. [McSweeney's] * Even Marc Kasowitz is shocked -- SHOCKED! -- over the reality. [Politico] * Your daily reminder that you really should give money to the ACLU. [The Slot] * Playing the "What Coulda Been" game with Chris Christie's career. [Law and More] * Dems are gunning for Jared Kushner's security clearance. [Huffington Post] * Being versatile increases your value as an M&A lawyer, as Forrest Alogna and William Savitt explain. [American Bar Association] * It's like he has no idea how the law or politics or... anything works. [CNBC] * Above the Law turns 11 next month, and David Lat explains to Karl Florida of Thomson Reuters how it all began. [Legal Current]

By Kathryn Rubino
Non-Sequiturs

Non-Sequiturs: 07.10.17

* The biggest Biglaw story today is that New York's "summer of hell" has started. Amtrak promises that Penn Station will be fixed by Labor Day. But if the repairs linger into the fall, I promise you the extra commute will be the straw that breaks the back of Manhattan lawyers who live outside the five boroughs. [NPR] * I'm really conflicted about America's response to the "opioid crisis." On the one hand, treating drug addiction like a sickness instead of a crime is clearly the right way to go. This first of its kind "Opioid Court" in Buffalo is a fantastic idea. On the other hand, black people have been suffering from addiction for years, and far from caring about it, white people have used drugs as an excuse to murder us and incarcerate us. NOW that some white girls are hooked, y'all want to give a crap? Can it be a really laudable evolution if it's covered in racist hypocrisy? [NBC News] * I learned a new racial epithet, courtesy of the Brexit people. [Independent] * When the headline reads "Lawyer is reprimanded over penis amputation suit" I have to include it. Because I am a grown man and not a ten-year-old. [ABA Journal] * The Miami Marlins are suing season ticket holders who renege on long term contracts. I say again, the Marlins are suing their own fans. The fact that this franchise has won two championships in the last 20 years is all the proof I need that God does not give a f**k about sports. [Miami New Times] * In other sports news, Chris Christie is auditioning to fill Mike Francesca's sports talking spot this week on WFAN. Christie will be GREAT at: framing every athletic competition in terms of moral struggle, secretly schilling for the interests of billionaire owners over the rights of their employees, and belittling and humiliating people who call in to express their opinion. Christie will be better at this than anything he's done before. [Deadspin] * Louisiana police officer is suing... #BlackLivesMatter over the police ambush that left three officers dead. It should be noted that the person who shot the police officers was brought to swift and brutal justice, while the officers who shot and killed: Michael Brown, Eric Garner, Tamir Rice, Walter Scott, Kieth Lamont Scot, Jamar Clark, Jordan Davis, Philando Castille, Laquan McDonald, Terence Crutcher, and Alton Sterling are still running around here free to sue whoever they want. [CNN] * I try to bother you with Alt-Right news only on Friday, but I had to check in with how they're handling the Don Trump Jr. "of course I tried to collude with the Russians" revelation. Here, the New York Post calls the story a "yawn," because apparently everybody would naturally try to collude with a foreign government if they promise dirt on political opponents. So the Post says they were just talking about the Magnitsky Act and Russian adoptions. Thing is, Russia's adoption policy was retaliation for sanctions against it contained in the Magnitsky Act. So by talking "adoptions" they really were talking "sanctions," WHICH THEY WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO DO. [New York Post]

By Elie Mystal